Nothing irritates me more than people using this oft and mis used phrase to get things done. And what irritates me even more is people falling for it and doing something they’d ideally not do …
A very common example – Mr A generally, does not drink. Ok well, he is a social drinker, but does not want to drink on a particular evening. Someone insignificant walks upto him and says “Buddy, lets share a drink”. “No man! Not in a mood to .. u go ahead, i’ll sip some orange juice instead.” “That’s not done! Come on, be a man .. lets share a drink”. Mr A, quietly accepts a glass and nurses that drink all evening, he does not want to drink .. he can barely sip it .. but he will finish it, coz someone insignificant said to do so would be “being a man”.
Now I know, a lot of you reading this are probably thinking, “Is she hinting at me?” .. well yes, I am .. to each one of you who does this .. and you and I both know it. So .. read on carefully and if it makes sense, please stop giving into the “be a man” trap.
“To be a man” is not to give into something which hardly matters to you. “To be a man” is to be able to say “I stand for this, and I will do so”. Standing up for your own beliefs, moods, and principles; unless convinced otherwise very logically, is being a man – for me. I respect those who say they do not drink or do not want to drink, and who actually do not. I respect those men, who stand up for their morals and thoughts and wants, even if they are the only ones standing on that side of the line. And why do I respect them? For two reasons – they are being in real life what they claim to be verbally and they are standing up for something. You know, that adage – if you don’t stand up for something, you fall for anything – does hold true. Hence for me, as a girl, it is important that a guy is standing on the same side of the issue as he is claiming to. Of course, a man can be convinced to do something otherwise, and that is normal in the interactive society that we humans live in – so he has all the right to change his stand, but when he does this as soon as he hears the 3 magic words – be a man – dude, you lose me and a significant amount of my respect for you.